my system can't FuNcTiOn on one shot

So, I was catching the bus in front of my old high school the other day, and I looked across the street to behold a phenomenon that has really taken off since I was a student there: a large cluster of 10-15 kids on their lunch break crowded around the Cool Beans coffee stand. I've seen this plenty of times before, since I just work up the street, and I always want to assume that only one or two of them are ever actually buying a drink, but I could be wrong. I just watched this dumb video clip from The Early Show about teens and coffee consumption. In a nutshell, they drink like, a lot. It's the new thing to head down to the 'Bou after class and get yr grandé cup of whipped cream with a couple shots and some chocolate syrup in it. Oh, and don't forget yr guitar cuz we're gonna jam outside.

I also read this dumb news article with this quote that I just think is So Classic: "Coffee jazzes me," says one 15-year-old Highland youth, who asked that his name be withheld. "It makes conversation more interesting, keeps me awake and it's legal. It sure beats alcohol, Ecstasy or pot." I honestly could not imagine those words ever coming out of my mouth at age 15 (or now), even though that was probably the age when I first started drinking coffee occasionally. That's when The Black Drop opened here in Bellingham, and I thought to myself, Finally, a decent place to skip Geometry, but there just wasn't the same allure of a bunch of fancy drinks with 4 shots and chocolate chips all up in em. That's still not enticing to me, but the Black Drop does have good coffee and I do still hang out there. I think I just missed the boat on the whole craze, because to this day, I can only ever drink a mocha or something similar with one shot in 8 ounces of milk. All these kids are just chugging it, though, and I can't help but think of how that's going to mess them up eventually. They'll never be able to function without it, like that really smart chick in the video said about herself already, and she's what, like 16 maybe? Be kinder to your *system,* gurl, and it will thank you in the long run. Unless it's your goal to become a jittery, neurotic bitch by the time you start college. If so... go for that extra shot. Might as well get a head start.